Soul Food - Abiding Part Two

by Kelly

Ever since I was a little girl, I enjoyed writing. You could never come into my room and not find a journal of some sort with written prayers, ideas, dreams, or letters concealed in it. In fact, I’m convinced my parents still have letters I would write them either apologizing for my misbehavior or announcing that I was moving away...at the age of eight. Most recently, I was perusing through a plastic bin filled with things from my childhood (that my mom had inconspicuously left at my house after a visit) when I came across my first ever diary. Complete with a sweet looking, 90’s unicorn on the front and a lock on the side (side note: Can we bring those back? Pure awesomeness). I flipped open the first page and couldn’t help but laugh uncontrollably as I found a letter dated “July 19, 1996” with the attention, “To: Jordan” (my younger brother’s friend), who had stayed that particular night at our house, with the content reading (in my eleven year old handwriting):

“Do you love me?

Do you want to be my friend?

And if you do...well then don’t be afraid to take me by the hand if you waaant to..

I think this is how loves goes...check yes or no.”

Two giant boxes with the words “yes” and “no” followed leaving “Jordan” ample space to either accept or deny my offer. As I anxiously awaited outside the door, in a matter of seconds, I heard laughing followed by ‘Ewww gross!’ as he shoved the diary back under the door with the most gigantic check mark I’ve ever seen in the “NO” box. Tears from laughter flooded my eyes as I reminisced that old memory. Then it occurred to me that while the content of my journals look a bit different than they did when I was ten, they still represent time spent pouring my heart out onto pages and pages of empty paper. But was it quality time and was it consistent? Unfortunately, my answer to this question was a big fat check mark in the “no” box.

If you were able to catch my last post (Dead Things - Abiding Part One), I shared how, I believe, it is crucial that we allow the pruning process to happen. Simplistically speaking, this looks like surrender; laying down the things that aren’t serving us, fulfilling, or sustaining us, and exchanging them for the only thing that can: Him. When we are able to do this, with His help, we create room and space for the Holy Spirit to dwell within us and therefore work through us. John 15:5 says, “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing” (NLT). Other versions substitute the word “remain” for abide, reside, or dwell. Just like my little potted hydrangea plant needed water and sunlight everyday for it to perk back up, our souls need the living and active (Hebrews 4:12 ESV) word of God to be sustained.

When the Holy Spirit confronted me on this issue, I thought I had the quiet time game on lock and key. I was getting along just fine waking up whenever I wanted and reading whatever devotional happened to be on my nightstand. Writing out a prayer in my journal outlining everything I needed God to do for me seemed sufficient. I figured thumbing through the pages of my Bible and landing on a verse was enough to get me through this life. It was sustaining me to a point. When He taught me this, it came at an extremely unusual time. (Quick timeout) I just love how God uses what we see as “horrible circumstances” to teach us the most valuable lessons. The kids, Mike, and I were on our 2nd week of being homeless. We had just sold our house, and we were anxiously waiting for our other house to finish up being built. Being in a hotel room on the tail end of Christmas break with all three kids under the age of 6 was a little intense to say the least. One morning in particular, Mike had left for work and I was responsible for A) keeping the kids alive and B) making sure the hotel didn’t burn down. As I sat on the bed, with cartoons blaring and kids literally running around in circles (if you have boys, you can mentally picture this), I opened up my Bible to the book of Hebrews hoping it could bring me a sense of calm amidst the storm brewing around me. It was in the twelfth chapter of Hebrews that the Holy Spirit spoke something so powerful to me, so important, and so prompting that I can pinpoint that being the day that my “quiet times” with the Lord changed...for the better. “...Let us strip off every weight that slows us down...and let us run with endurance the race God has set before us” (Hebrews 12:1-2 NLT). This word “weight” seemed to jump off the page at me and slap me in the face. Or that may have been a kid’s shoe? Regardless, as the kids jumped on the bed beside me, I frantically scribbled on my journal...“What are the things weighing me down and making it hard for me to FOCUS on Jesus?”. Suddenly it occurred to me that I was distracted. You may be thinking...DUH KELLY. But I knew, in order to spend quality time with the Lord, I needed to start waking up before the kids woke to meet with Him. Really meet with Jesus. The Almighty might as well have handed me an exclusive invitation to a private meeting, because I knew without a shadow of a doubt this is what He wanted me to do. Mind you, I’ve NEVER been a morning person. In fact, I was the type of person that got mad when my husband (who IS a morning person) would be too happy in the morning. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, however, it’s that every time I use the phrase, “I could never give up (in this case, sleep)”, that’s usually the exact thing he wants me to give up. BUT OMGOSH let me cup your sweet cheeks in my hands, look you square in the eyes and tell you, “How my life has radically changed by this one decision!!”. That 6am wake up call has undoubtedly become my most favorite part of my entire day. What used to be a struggle is now something I look forward too. I can’t wait to open His word and see what He has to show me.

Feeding our physical bodies isn’t something we do just every now and then. It’s an everyday endeavor that is crucial to our survival. Food not only helps us live, but it gives us strength. It makes us feel better, and it has the ability to change our mood (no one likes to see me “hangry”...just ask Mike). The right foods also have the power to heal us. How true this is of consistent time spent in the word of God! Jesus said, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.” (John 6:35 ESV). Certain books, devotionals, podcasts, sermons...even this blog post are all great supplements to the Bible, but nothing...and I mean NOTHING should substitute it. Had I filled my hydrangeas with Coke or Dr. Pepper after removing the dead leaves, I would not have seen new growth happen. Contrary, the plant would have most likely died. The saying, “what you put in, you’ll get out” couldn’t be more spot on. Life is full of peaks and valleys. The Christian life is no different; but taking your share of the “daily bread” referred to in John, consistently, will undoubtedly change your perspective and outlook on it; making it to where abundant living is the protocol.

Lord,

Thank you for being everything we could ever need or want. Thank you for not only sustaining our physical bodies with nourishment, but also sustaining our souls with the good news of the Bible when we choose to abide in you. Lord, open our eyes and ears to the word and allow the text to jump off the page into our innermost being. Speak to us, Lord. May we dwell in your presence each and every day.

Amen.